What makes Referral Exchange different?

To learn how you can start getting new leads through referrals, call: 401-555-1234

Learn more networking tips from our video series on YouTube.

Richard Austin

Richard Austin
Are you a Tourist or a Pilgrim? John Bunyan’s The Pilgrim’s Progress was published in 1678 and was written by him while he was imprisoned in Bedfordshire county prison, convicted of holding religious services outside the auspices of the Church of England. His first sentence for this offense was 12 years, during which time he penned what is considered to be one of the most significant works of theological fiction in English literature. Weighing in at a whopping 108, 260 words, it tells the tale of the trials and tribulations of the main character, Christian, as he attempts to complete his journey to the Celestial City. I recently read an article regarding dedication and devotion to the important things in our lives, such as family, home, and business. Which made me ask the question, how many of us are merely tourists when it comes to our businesses? A tourist business mindset is characterized by a causal, superficial approach to our clients and our services. We love being in business and enjoying all the perks, but we shy away from the real grind of the day-to-day. Like tourists, we enjoy the networking events and the lunches, but are reluctant to get our hands dirty. We put-off the hard work, and when it becomes absolutely necessary, we put something together as quick as we can and apologize for the delay because we’ve “just been so busy.” A pilgrim, on the other hand, understands the rigors of the journey ahead and not only prepares for them, but enjoys the challenge. We realize that being in business for ourselves should be viewed as a rigorous adventure, complete with successes and failures, but ultimately rewarding in the end. Since I’m borrowing from a religious lexicon, I’ll close by saying it’s not enough to be pilgrims. We need to be business disciples, constantly learning about our craft and our vocations. Even if we think of ourselves as “experts,” a true business disciple knows that there is always more to learn. More to understand and therefore more that we can offer to our clients. Anne Michaels, Canadian poet and novelist wrote “Hold a book in your hand and you’re a pilgrim at the gates of a new city.” Whether it’s a book, Youtube video, webinar, workshop or seminar, every time we learn something new, we’re committing ourselves once again to being a business pilgrim, rather than merely a tourist.
Since it’s still January, where we typically look forward to what we want to accomplish in the year ahead, I thought we would continue in that vein this week and look at something I know is of major concern for you in 2023. Neuroplasticity. One of the main tenets of Rx is the need to focus on being smarter than your competition. We’ve often discussed the need to learn more and being regarded as the go-to person in your profession, but we’ve never really looked at how to accomplish that from a physical perspective. Physical as in how to actually strengthen the brain itself. Normally, when we are in our 30s and 40s, the brain begins a gradual decline, shrinking in size. This is particularly true for the frontal lobe and hippocampus, areas involved in higher cognitive function and the encoding of new memories. Luckily, this these changes are barely noticeable in our day-to-day activities. The occasional searching for the right word, mis-placing your keys, or driving a little slower are typical examples of this type of minor decline. The good news is that we can fight back against Father Time by taking advantage of the brain’s natural neuroplasticity. Neuroplasticity is the capacity for our brain cells to change in response to our behavior. Research now shows that the brain is a highly active and malleable learning machine and can continue to be throughout our lifetime. The activity of learning something new can ignite a cascade of changes in our brains that can not only retard but reverse the effects of aging. As explained by Dr. Megan Call, Resiliency Center Director at the University of Utah, “Neuroplastic change occurs at the chemical, structural and functional levels of the brain. These changes work in concert with one another.” Dr. Call explains that there are five components to get us started on creating those new neural pathways. First, the new skill we want to learn should be challenging and novel. Not too easy to learn, and something you’ve always wanted to do. Next, there must be some intention, or relevance that makes the skill important to you. When it’s something you really want to do, part of the neuroplastic change you’ll seeking will come from the associated feeling of accomplishment and reward. Specific attention is also required. We need to have a plan, set a schedule, and stick to it. Setting personal goals and milestones are a great approach. Repetition and intensity are also critical to laying down new neural pathways. Dr. Call recommends shorter bouts of intense repetition to solidify the new neural connections. Finally, take the time needed to make it happen. It’s not a one-and-done proposition. Neuroplastic change takes time for structural and functional change to occur. She concludes by saying “Be sure to choose an activity that is new, challenging, and important to you. Commit yourself to engaging in the exercise as frequently as you can. Examples may include: learning a musical instrument, a new language, a new, hobby, or studying and becoming knowledgeable in a new subject. So, let’s get busy strengthening our brains!
Before we can look forward to 2023, we should reflect on 2022 and see what we learned and how we should carry those lessons forward. To this end, I’ve compiled a couple of questions for your consideration. 1. What have you not done this year that you wish you had? Every year, we plan on accomplishing something, either in our business or our personal life, and every year, there are at least one (most likely several) that we don’t do. If so, we should look at these self-made promises and ask a couple of questions. • Was it not important enough? • Was it too hard or not realistic? • Were there things we needed to do or learn first? • Did it require resources, such as money, that we didn’t have? The answers to these questions will reveal whether you should let it drop or try again. For example: • If it simply wasn’t important enough, but more of whim, then you know to forget about it. • If it was too hard, but still important, you need to dig deeper, such as: o It was too intimidating, could I have started small by just doing a piece of it? • If it was too difficult to start, you probably didn’t know enough about it. If it’s still important, make a plan to first learn what it is you need to know, and then make a plan to address your lack of knowledge until you’re more confident and know how to begin. • If it required resources, such as money, you need to ask questions such as: o If it was so important, why didn’t I divert resources from somewhere else?  If I didn’t do that, was it really as important as I thought? o If resources were difficult, can I pare down the plan and start smaller? The second question for consideration as we reflect back on 2022 is: 2. What is one thing that went badly in 2022 that you would handle differently and how can you prepare yourself to do so? • The first thing to do is resist assigning blame. Blaming yourself or someone else doesn’t advance the cause. Instead of asking who, ask why. • Did you prepare sufficiently? • Did you know what you needed to know? • Did you have the resources/time to do it right? • Is it something you needed to do or wanted to do – this will make a difference. If it’s something you need to do but don’t want to do it, can you contract it out? Not only will this allow you to get it done, but if you choose the right contractor, it will be done right. • If it is something you want to do, you need to go back to your first list of questions, such as: is it important enough, etc. Just because you want to do it, doesn’t mean it’s best for your business. If you only reflect on these two questions, honestly, you’ll have a jump-start on a successful 2023. I hope you got something out of that. Before I let you go, I’m excited to tell you that my first book “Build Your REP”, is now available in paperback and ebook editions through Amazon. Give it a read and let me know what you think and leave a review if you like it! Thanks, and I’ll see you next week with another edition of EnRICHment.
Nike has been incredibly successful by urging their customers to “Just Do It.” Simple, to the point, no excuses advice. Billionaire Warren Buffett twists this just a bit by explaining that if you want to be really successful, “Just Say No.” He attributes his success not so much about what he has done, as to what he hasn’t done. He tells us that setting boundaries, in business and in life are what is needed for true success. One of his best-known quotes is “The difference between successful people and really successful people is that really successful people say no to almost everything.” We get pitched exciting ideas and opportunities every day, with the promise of success, and a big dose of “don’t be left out”. We’re afraid that we’ll be left behind and left out. We secretly fear that the other guy is smarter than us. We let our ambition get ahead of our true priorities. Saying no is the best path to simplification. When we say yes to too much, our businesses and our lives get over-complicated with conflicting priorities until either nothing is a priority, or everything is. Steve Jobs expressed the same philosophy when he said “People think focus means saying yes to the thing you’ve got to focus on. But that’s not what it means at all. It means saying no to the hundred other good ideas that there are. You have to pick carefully. I’m actually as proud of the things we haven’t done as the things I have done. Innovation is saying no to 1,000 things.” Jim Collins, author of Good to Great, suggested that instead of to-do lists, we should make “stop-doing” lists. As listed in an article by Marcel Schwantes in Inc., there are seven things that most successful people say no to on a regular basis. 1. They say no to opportunities and things that don't excite them, speak to their values, or further their mission in life. 2. They say no to superficial networking events in which people swap business cards and never hear from one another. Why? Because successful people don't network. They build relationships. 3. They say no to spending time with uninspiring, critical, or negative people who drag them down. Time is precious -- choose a small circle of people who will energize you and challenge you to be better. 4. They say no to overworking. Very successful people aren't workaholics who neglect self-care and family. They recognize that if they can't take care of themselves, everything else suffers. 5. They say no to doing all the work. This comes down to one word: Delegation. 6. Don’t let people set your agenda in life." 7. They say no to people-pleasing. Warren Buffett has a three-step rule of focus for success: 1. Write down a list of your top 25 career goals. 2. Circle the five most important goals that truly speak to you. These are your most urgent goals. 3. Completely eliminate the other 20 goals you have listed. Just cross them off, despite if they hold weight or some level of importance. Buffett says those 20 goals are lower and not urgent priorities, therefore, any effort invested in them steals away dedicated focus and energy from your five highest-priority goals.
CREATIVITY OR INTELLIGENCE? Creativity comes in many forms. Most of us, if asked to name creative people, would immediately start mentioning writers, painters, sculptures, musicians, actors, and actresses. That’s natural. We recognize these creative talents immediately. We even devote schools and advanced degrees to them. Rhode Island School of Design. Berklee College of Music. Emory University. California Institute of the Arts. Juilliard. This list covers the creativeness that society tells us is important; and of course, it is. But what about other types of creativity? Robert E. Franken, in Human Motivation, defines creativity as “…the tendency to generate or recognize ideas, alternatives, or possibilities that may be useful in solving problems, communicating with others and entertaining ourselves and others.” Another field of study relates creativity with intelligence. Howard Gardner, in Frames of Mind: The Theory of Multiple Intelligences postulated up to 9 types of intelligences. Several of these are what we would expect. Musical Intelligence, Logical-Mathematical Intelligence, Intra-Personal Intelligence (philosophers, psychologists, spiritual leaders), and Linguistic Intelligence (novelist, translators, poets). Other types that may not readily come to mind include Naturalist Intelligence (nature smart), Body-Kinesthetic Intelligence (think Michael Jordan), and Spatial Intelligence (the ability to think in three dimensions – sailors, pilots, sculptors, and architects). I worked with a carpenter for a while and was always amazed at his ability to look at a difficult repair or restoration, walk around it, ruminate, and then come up with a solution. In most cases I would have just hit it with a hammer. Everyone has some type of creativity lurking inside. The lucky ones find it and use it. Some don’t. Part of the reason creativity often goes unrecognized is because society doesn’t value it. Our educational system is designed to recognize, teach, and reward a limited range of creativity. The SATs score for mathematics, critical reading, and writing. Although other types of intelligences, or creativity may help boost, in an ancillary way, these three scores, in themselves, they often go unrecognized and unappreciated. As business owners and entrepreneurs, we need to be aware of all types of creativity. Not only in those we work with, so we can tap into it, but in ourselves. We need to learn how to recognize our creative abilities, appreciate them, support them, and promote them. We need to capitalize on them to grow our businesses. We should conduct a thoughtful and truthful analysis of our creative strengths. We also need to have conversations with others as to what they consider to be our creative strengths and why. An honest discussion, without false modesty or embellishment is needed for this exercise. Once we have identified our creative strengths, we need to develop them and learn how to apply them to our businesses. As stated in Success.com, “In a world where we’re constantly bombarded with images, videos, and soundbites of creative expression, it’s easy to diminish our own talents. If you want to get started, identify those things that bring you joy. Those things that naturally come easy. Those things that you tend to get lost in. I found a lot of quotes about creativity, but this one, by Hugh Macleod, author of How to be creative, stuck with me. He said, “It’s about what you are going to do with the short time you have left on this earth.”
“Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life.” We have all heard a version of this. The origin of it is unclear, but many have taken it to heart. Those who have often struggle, at times, to live up to the spirit of the quote. I posit that although we would all love to think it’s true, I don’t believe it. I love what I do. Okay, let me rephrase that. I love most of what I do. Some days I might even lower this to “I love a lot of what I do.” However, if we’re honest with ourselves, even if we love what we do, if we’re doing it right, some days our work can be extremely stressful and headache-inducing. We all love to play and have fun. Since the time we were little kids out on the playground, we loved to play. Our parents would tell us to “go out and play,” although this was often more for their benefit than for ours. However, none of us should be playing at our business. It’s a serious undertaking with considerable consequences for us and our clients if we get it wrong. According to a June 2021 article in the Journal of Sports Rehabilitation, up to 68% of NFL players may be injured in any one season. While some players remain remarkably injury-free (or are at least healthy enough to play), many players suffer multiple injuries throughout a season, requiring surgery and painful rehab. Not one of them will tell you this is fun. Most of them will tell you they love what they do, but none of them will tell you it isn’t hard, real work, day in and day out. Well, maybe the kickers. We may not be facing painful physical injury in our businesses, but if we’re not working at it, we’re not doing it right. I would hazard to say that if all we do is have fun day after day, we’re probably coasting. We certainly aren’t learning anything new. We aren’t wading into deeper waters where it’s a bit uncomfortable. We aren’t growing. As Andy Dufresne said in Shawshank Redemption, we need to “get busy living or get busy dying.” Roberta Smith, co-chief art critic at The New York Times said, “When you stop learning, you stop growing; when you stop growing, your stop living.” Learning new things about what we do, about our businesses, and about the variety of subjects that can impact how well we do our jobs is critical to staying on top and providing the best services to our clients. It requires constant work, that often includes early mornings, late nights, or putting ourselves in situations that make us uncomfortable or unsure of ourselves. This isn’t something anyone loves to do, but it’s the hard work necessary to grow and succeed. In a post by Shemena Johnson, a renowned psychotherapist, she states “The dichotomy between emotions of love and hate can be confusing when they seem to exist at the same time.” However, she is quick to point out that when both are present, they are both temporary. Love and hate are natural human emotions that can seem to overlap. At times, it seems like the distance between the two is an immense gap, while at other times, they seem to be rubbing up against each-other. It's okay to say, “I love what I do.” In fact, that’s why most of us are in business. But don’t fall prey to the trap of “I’ll never work a day in my life.” If you’re growing and learning, you’re working – and some days it’s going to be hard. As Henry Ford said, “Thinking is the hardest work there is, which is probably the reason, so few engage in it.”
Non-Verbal Communication in the Digital World Up until a few years ago, most of us had seldom, if ever, attended a virtual meeting. Those of us who did a lot of networking and were leasing our transportation were keeping a watchful eye on the odometer lest we exceed our milage allowances. Then came COVID, and our cars were parked more often than they were driven, and we were forced to adjust to a whole new virtual world. We joked about not having to wear dress pants and played around with fanciful zoom backgrounds, but, eventually, we had to get serious. We realized that although we were well-versed in reading in-person body language and non-verbal communication cues, we were ill-prepared to understand this facet of communication skills when it came to on-screen meetings. Just as you wouldn’t go to a business meeting dressed in shorts and a Hawaiian shirt, we had to learn how to present ourselves on-camera. There are subtle ways to communicate effectively and non-verbally online, and we need to use them to our advantage. In a BBC Worklife article, by Joanna York, she quotes a non-verbal communications expert who states that “… people often react more to what you do than what you say, “because it communicates the underlying message ¬– what you really think and feel, and your intentions.” In other words, your professionalism is on display whenever you sit in front of your camera, just as much as if you were sitting at a table in a conference room. Even in a virtual meeting, non-verbal communication is occurring. Ms. York writes: “a 2022 survey of 200 executives showed that 92% of managers believed that employees who turned off their cameras during meetings were less likely to have a long-term future at their company.” There are a few obvious methods to convey online professionalism online and use non-verbal communication effectively. Ms. York quotes Mi Ridell, an expert in body language based in Stockholm, Sweden, “Eye contact particularly is positively associated with likeability, social presence, and interpersonal attraction. Yet making eye-contact on a video call requires us to go against our natural instincts. The brain wants to look at the face [on the screen]” says Ridell, “but you have to learn to look in the camera when it’s your turn to speak.” Additionally, the background you use can reveal a lot. As Julie Hansen writes in Business2community, “Your background makes a strong statement about you. You are quite literally projecting an image, whether professional or otherwise, to your customer. So, make sure that your real or virtual background supports that image by being neat and clutter free, well-lit, and perhaps with a spark of personality.” The choice of real versus virtual background depends on several considerations. Welcoming people into your home can humanize you and recreate a special connection. At other times, you may wish to project a more professional persona by using a virtual background. Here are few examples of dos and don’ts. The bottom line – projecting professionalism, whether in-person or online is the key to successful business communication. Here are a few questions to think about. 1. Have you given thought to your background and what it says about you? 2. Do you tend to feel more casual and relaxed when communicating online versus in an office setting? Do you think you might make some changes now after learning about this subject?
Of all the different types of life on earth, only mankind has eternity in their minds – or as some authors have expressed it, eternity in their hearts. Only we have a concept of yesterday, today, and tomorrow. Only we prepare for and worry about the future. You could ask – “What about squirrels burying their nuts?” Research has found that this is an instinctive activity rather than a learned one. Squirrels are “hard-wired” to do this. Of course, they then must find the buried nuts when they need them. . Do they remember where they buried them? Research indicates they do not. Instead, by burying thousands of nuts within a certain location, squirrels will eventually dig some of them up when they’re hungry. But back to us. When we think of time, we are most likely thinking of the future because it’s really the only thing we have some control over. So, most of our thoughts and activities are focused on the future and how we can impact it. Most of us have our own businesses because we want to work for ourselves. Some may own their own businesses someone didn’t want us working for them. Having control of our work, our own schedules, and setting our own lifestyle can be a motivating factor for some. A major reason why many of us create our own businesses is so we can have more control. However, with our knowledge of eternity, we also feel an urge to leave something behind, something to be remembered by a legacy if you will. For many of us, our first legacy will be our children. Granted, the birth of a child is wonderous, but if we think about it just a bit more, there is a great deal more happening. When a child is born, a father is also born. A mother is born. Grandparents are born. Uncles and aunts and cousins are born. A baby is a drop in the cosmic pond that ripples outward creating new relationships and part of a legacy. Although some people create a new business to make a quick buck or take advantage of a brief trend or a temporary need, most of us create our businesses so we can, in part, build something that we can leave behind, a legacy saying, “we were here.” Granted, financial advisors and attorneys can do the heavy lifting when it comes to the money part. However, this isn’t the sort of legacy we should be the most concerned with. Just as a baby spreads ripples out among its family and beyond, we should be looking at what our business legacy will say about us. The science behind the creation of ripples in a pond is all about energy generated and then transferred from the motion of the rock to the water. In the same way, the energy we generate with our business will have a similar effect. The more positive energy we create, the bigger and more far-reaching those ripples will be. This positive energy should consist of goodwill, honesty, a lasting reputation, generosity, and of course great products and services. By supporting one another when things don’t go as planned, celebrating one other’s accomplishments, and holding each other to the highest standards, we can ensure that our legacies are something we can be proud of. Alfred Nobel is seldom remembered as the man who invented dynamite, but instead, he is celebrated as the man who established the Nobel Prize. Not bad for guy who used to be known for conceiving better ways of blowing things up. Questions: 1. How are some ways our Rx members can positivity contribute to each of our business legacies? (Support on social media, support as friend or advisor, holding one another accountable, etc.) 2. If your business is one that you can’t pass on to your children, or they don’t choose to continue your business), how have you still created a legacy for them? (Honesty, good reputation in community or business world, generosity, helping others to succeed, charitable contributions that will be remembered even when the business is gone).
Timing To Everything There is a season and a purpose, under heaven. A time to be born, a time to die, a time to plant, a time to reap, a time to kill, a time to heal, a time to laugh, a time to weep. This is the first verse of Turn, Turn, Turn. In 1965, the American folk-rock group the Byrds released Turn, Turn, Turn, which eventually reached number one on the Billboard Hot 100 chart on December 4, 1965. Although the song was written by Pete Seeger in the late 1950s, the lyrics were actually written by King Solomon about 450 BCE. Verse two explains that there is a time to build up, a time to break down, a time to dance, a time to mourn, a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together. To put Solomons’ words in modern terms, timing is everything. Do it at the right time, you’ll succeed. Do it at the wrong time, and you won’t. In a Hello Planet article by Elizabeth Dawber, she provides some eye-opening statistics to back up the importance of timing. Every day, over 137,000 startups are created, each with a different idea, a different business strategy, a different aim. Out of them, 120,000 will fail and only 17,000 will mature into companies; they may be technology, scientific, agricultural, or even floral startups but that does not matter. Many of these 120,000 failed startups had great ideas, a great business model, even great funding but they missed out on one thing out. Timing. In Bill Gross’s Ted Talk, he explains that “…he analyzed the success in more than 200 famous companies on the Fortune 100 and this is what he found: 42% had great timing, 32% a good team, 28% an interesting idea, and only 14% had great funding.” Ms. Dawber goes on to say, “If you want your business to succeed, all your decisions, from hiring to launching new products should be based on timing.” In Businesstoyou.com, they use the acronym PESTEL to explain how any new business should analyze whether or not their timing is right. PESTEL stands for macro-environmental factors, which include, political, economic, social, technological, environmental, and legal challenges. Here’s an example of good timing. The companies Shell Oil, Total, and British Petroleum were all founded 15 years from another in the 1910s. Why is this important? Because the timing was perfect. The automobile was transcendent, and the petrol revolution was just getting started. With any new company or even new product or service line, we need to first and foremost think about timing. Besides the PESTEL analysis, we need to ask ourselves questions such as, “am I taking on too much,” “will my other services suffer,” “am I too late to the game,” etc. There is a Critical Mass Theory of Startups that examines timing. When displayed on a value/time graph, the important factors include enabling technologies, economic impetus, and cultural buy-in. If these three elements are not encouraging, your timing is wrong. Solomon was right. To everything there is a season. We just need to do our homework to see where we stand. Hesiod, an ancient Greek poet, and a contemporary of Homer wrote “Observe due measure, for right timing is in all things the most important factor.” Here are a couple of questions for your consideration. 1. If you were going to launch a new product or service for your business, how would you determine the best timing to introduce it? 2. If you are considering expanding your business or service or hiring additional staff, what are some of the questions you need to consider first?
Load More... Subscribe